Rehab..(Part 3)

 Lewis and me were buddies..He was a black guy that reminded me of Sidney Portier a little. Quiet.. He knew how to size folks up and make excellent judgment calls with very little data..Didn’t suffer fools gladly.. He pegged me pretty quick as the Saltine I was, but I don’t give up easy..( When I run into a person who actively decides they don’t want to have anything to do with me it just makes me want to try harder..)  Once he accepted the unlikely fact that we were going to be friends he gave in pretty fast, ( or he was just humoring me the whole time..)                                                         We were called, ( behind our backs) the Kook and the Spook..

 One day after breakfast we got to talking and of course, being in a Rehab and all, the conversation soon became inappropriate..         “Hey man, I’m curious” I said, “Do you, umm, do your - “  Lewis looked at me out of the corner of his eye - “My people?” He said..            “Yeah!  Do y’all really not shampoo your hair- you just, like, change the oil every once in a while?”                                                               “Yes, some..”   Well, that was no answer, so I looked at him with a stupid, questioning stare..

 “ Have you ever used a balloon to comb your hair?” He asked..” That’s what my hair would look like if I used your shampoo..”

 This was starting to get interesting so I kept going, “ Well, what about food preferences?”   Again, he knew exactly where I was clumsily trying to go..” Don’t YOU like fried chicken and watermelon?” he dryly asked..                       “Okay, but what’s up with all the Tobasco, and the Red Hot Blow Up Your Ass flavored Cheetos?” I was really getting myself worked up in a lather now.

 Once again he got all cryptic, “Just a preference maybe - maybe it’s just a black thang, you know..” But I didn’t know.. I liked a few jalapeños occasionally  - some Tobasco on a good cheeseburger - but to me HOT isn’t really a flavor, it’s just hot..And I’d never put it on ice cream for Pete’s sake! 

“ Let’s go play chess”..he said. And so we did.

‘Tis the season..

 Joe Biden is a menace to America and all of western civilization in general..It’s a damn shame his own mother didn’t share his views on abortion..

                                 *

 “Don’t tell me about the pain - just show me the baby..”

                                 *

                        Danny Boy                                

              ( My favorite folk song)

 But come ye back when summer’s in the meadow.                                             

 Or when the valley’s hushed and white with snow,

‘Tis I’ll be here in sunshine or in shadow.        O Danny boy, O Danny boy,  I love you so.

 And I will hear, though soft you tread above me,

 And all my grave shall warmer, sweeter be,     If you will bend and tell me that you love me,

 Then I will sleep in peace ‘till you come back to me..

                                   *

 “I’ve been a proud gun-owner since kindergarten..”                                                    Brad Pitt

                                *

 “Born that man no more shall die;                     Born to raise the sons of earth                             Born to give them second birth.                         Hark! The herald angels sing,                             “Glory to the new-born King!”

                                  *

 I had a great Thanksgiving in Arkansas visiting my little brother and his darling wife.   I didn’t feel like I was wearing out my welcome until “someone” replaced the blue-mint Scope mouthwash with Windex..

                                 *

A guy I knew named Steiner owned a very successful nail and hardware company..He retired to Florida leaving the business to his son.. He was reading the newspaper one day and saw a full paged advertisement showing Christ hanging on the cross - the caption below said, “ They used Steiner nails.”                        He called his son in a fit, “What are you doing?! Are you crazy?!”                                   His son answered, “ Okay, Dad, okay! I’ll take care of it!”                                                           A week later the old man was reading the newspaper and saw another advertisement showing Christ laying face down in the dirt at the foot of the cross..                                           The caption below said, “ They DIDN’T use Steiner nails..”

      

Amazing Grace..

 I love the sound of the pipes..Stirs something ancient in my soul..

The Big War..

 This was written in the 11th hour, of the 11th day, of the 11th month..Exactly 104 years ago today the armistice was signed ending WW I..

                  Veterans Day - 2022                         (This is an intense one Ladies - fair warning..)

  It was called The Great War, the War to end all Wars, and World War I - it was also called The Great Folly..                                                   Nine million soldiers died in Europe between 1914 and 1918..( That is a lot..)  The U.S. lost 375,000 in WW II in the entire war …            As usual it was Germany against everybody else - especially France.. They literally fought over yards of earth they called No Man’s Land.(They were incorrect - it was millions of men’s land because they died on it..)

The soldiers in the trenches of World War I endured the most incredibly squalid conditions ever recorded in the history of warfare.. They lived in 5 foot by 8 foot holes dug into the mud along side rats the size of small dogs, in ankle deep water teeming with feces, viscera, and disease..

Both sides used the new Maxim machine guns that could fire 500 rounds in less than 10 seconds..Artillery shells were filled with chlorine gas that seared the lungs of anyone or anything that breathed it..Tanks and militarized airplanes were used for the first time and the result of using the uniquely horrific flamethrower ( or trench clearer ), could be smelled for miles..

If you were in this place, dying could actually seem like a very reasonable option..Many soldiers on both sides would go “over the top “ alone..It was certain death and was looked down upon as cowardly - suicide was the easy way out.. When ordered to charge the enemy they were usually only about the length of a football field away..The scale of slaughter was so massive that a pink mist would hang in the air for hours afterwards..Mercy was often asked for but rarely given. The men were ordered to hurdle the dead and impale the weak or wounded with their bayonets..( A notable exception to this mayhem happened on Christmas Eve, 1914 when German and Allied troops met together, sang carols, prayed, played soccer, and even exchanged what few valuables they had as presents..When morning came they generally went right back to trying to kill each other..) 

When America finally joined the war in late 1918 it put the final icing on the German’s cake... Representatives from all countries involved met in a railway car and signed a treaty that was so punitive to Germany it would lead directly to the rise of Adolph Hitler, World War II, and the Holocaust - a short 15 years later..

The day the war began in 1914 both sides thought it would only last a few months and both sides were certain that they would be victorious..It lasted for four dreadful years and wiped out an entire generation..

The latest film edition of the 1929 novel All Quiet on the Western Front is a triumph..Be sure to find the 2022 version - there are several.. It’s not for the squeamish - there are very graphic combat scenes and human misery on an epic level..It is a long one and you’ll be emotionally exhausted by the end - but it’s worth it..An Oscar contender, streaming on Netflix now..Satisfaction guaranteed or price of admission free..      5 Kleenex.

JBS Blackheart

                                                                 Tribute to the Great Fallen

Life..

 I’ve seen the Milky Way from the desolation of Big Bend,  lighting up the sky like a celestial beacon..Even with no moon one could easily negotiate a goat trail to the bottom of the canyon. I’ve seen the Golden Gate Bridge and Alcatraz Island through the early mist and fog of a Spring morning - when San Francisco was still the most beautiful city in America..I’ve been to Mardi Gras, and I’ve looked into the sculpted eyes of a 4,000 year old Egyptian queen.. I’ve seen the plaster casts of the unfortunate victims of the destruction of Pompeii by Mount Vesuvius.. You could still see the look of desperation on their faces after 2,000 years..

I’ve swam the Brazos at night with two friends, when it was still a mighty river, trying to answer the siren calls of girls laughing on the other side at a Girl Scout camp.. I’ve survived the explosion of a one pound can of 3-F black powder in my hand, in my own living room.. I’ve mourned for too many friends who decided that life just wasn’t for them anymore, and so ended theirs.. I’ve loved, and I’ve lost - telling young people that they aren’t an adult until they’ve had their heart ripped out and stomped into goo.. I’ve known and cherished several of the best damn dogs that ever caught a frisbee or tree’d a coon..    

I’ve been in places that were so hazardous to my life that the indigenous people there thought I was surely insane, so it would be bad luck to kill me..I’ve crossed the English Channel on a ferry in February weather that was so intense everyone on board wished it would just go ahead and sink, so that they could stop puking over the side..Seen the White Cliffs of Dover, which meant that we’d made it..I’ve seen the grave of Jim Morrison and seen Paris from the top of the Eiffel Tower..I’ve flirted with beautiful ladies shopping on the Champs Elysee’.. I’ve walked in the footsteps of Julius Caesar and felt the measured stomp of Roman  legionnaires and German soldiers.. I’ve had friends who would charge hell with a bucket of ice water with me..

And it feels like if I blink - it’ll all be over..And someday I’ll be right..                       Life is short - get on with yours..

JBS Blackheart

Rehab..(Part Two

 We were at lunch one day when the subject of bowel movements came up..” I ain’t had a solid shit since I got here” Lewis said matter of factly, while smothering his French fries in hot sauce and mustard..                                                   I agreed, looking suspiciously at my own plate. (This is considered entirely appropriate  conversation at a table of six men - in a Rehab.)                                                               A light bulb went off above Frank’s head and he said “Original John’s right - they must be putting Salt-Peter in our food just like they do in prison!” He knew about this from first hand experience, ( by now, after eight days, I had seniority among the other two Johns. They were both known as simply, Number Two..)     I said “ Frank, I’m not arguing with you but if they put the stuff in prison food, why is multiple rape such a problem?”                         “ Because nobody eats anything that isn’t wrapped and sealed.”  Makes sense, I thought, picturing piles of new Frito bags and Hostess Twinkies..

 “ I gotta go blow some mud..Again,” Corbin said.. We all nodded sympathetically then realized that there was now one less candidate to be the last one eating- and therefore table cleaner by Rehab Law..

  “What’s this afternoon’s schedule?” It was Tweety Bird, ( Yellow Carl.)                              “Same as yesterday and the day before that,”      Todd answered..Yellow Carl’s treatment was actually working. When he arrived he was the color of an old lemon, but he had been )drinking some glucose gunk, and NOT drinking a box of wine for breakfast everyday..                                      “You’re starting to look actually human - ish”   I said.. Carl smiled.. Steven said “We got pool time at 2:30 today - are you gonna share, Carl?”      “Share what ?”                                                      “Your yellow submarine!” We all laughed, including Tweety Bird..But he was beginning to catch on.. He looked back at Steven, ( who had summer teeth - summer here, summer there, and summer missing. )                             “At least I don’t look like a fucking Jack-o-lantern!”    

By this time we were all beating on the table and laughing so hard I was about to choke and Frank almost fell off of his chair..                      Our babysitter counselor was eyeing our table warily, wondering which one of us had smuggled in the drugs..

JBS Blackheart

Rehab..

 Richard was a large black man who made good money on the outside, had a lovely wife, kids, and a real sweet tooth for guns and crack.   One morning Frank and I were watching FOX News and a particularly smarmy African American woman was spewing the same old liberal lies.. Richard walked into the rec-room just in time to catch me flipping off the TV with both hands..

He said, “ Man, what’s up with you?” meaning what is your cracker-ass problem with my sista?  I told him he should mind his own business. I liked Richard but he was somewhat volcanic and I’d just lit his fuse.. He stared at me for a second then turned back out of the room..Then, he popped back in and asked, “What did you say?!”

I had said nothing, but we were going down the rabbit hole together and it was too late to turn around now..

“ I said Fuck You Richard!” Loudly..

Frank, an ex-con and even bigger than Richard got between us, looked calmly at Richard and said truthfully, “ Nobody said a word.”

It was over as quickly as it began.. I glanced at the closed-circuit camera and waved..In Rehab you are always being watched..

JBS Blackheart

Part Finish - The Reckoning

 ( Names have been changed to protect me from litigation)  True Story - every word.

  They say that men with clear consciences sleep like babies the night before their execution..I don’t remember..

   Monday morning I got to work at 0620 and headed straight to the office of my friend and assistant principal, Charlie. To many of his colleagues, and pretty much every parent of a student who had to deal with him, Charlie was considered a complete asshole.. We got along just fine..(After that day he only addressed me as “Rocky.” He would retire about seven years later with his beautiful Phillipino wife but not before he tried his best to hook me up with his sister-in-law..He told me that she only knew two words of English and they were both “Yes.”)

Thankfully, he was in early too..I walked into his office and closed the door behind me..Charlie’s eyebrows arched behind his desk..

“We need to talk, Charlie,” I said..He motioned for me to sit, which I did and I told him about Friday night..He didn’t say a word until I finished..

“ Well, Mister Stimmel - this all happened on your own time, right?”                                       “Right,” I said.. “And you weren’t arrested?Didn’t go to jail?”  He looked skeptical..                                       “No sir, I did get a ticket though..” He stared at me for a second - that seemed like a semester.. “Then I don’t see a problem.”  I left his office doing my happy-dance and high-fived the maintenance guy, then hugged a couple of cafeteria ladies remarking on how beautiful they looked that morning, on the way to my classroom. (I’m always friendly, but they must have thought I was high on something.) I unlocked my door and was halfway through it before I realized that the light was already on. Uh-oh - spider sense is going nuclear..

  THE Principal, Ms. Gee, is sitting in a chair beside my desk..Her eyes were locked on something - maybe all the artwork on the wall, maybe not, but she doesn’t even turn to look at me..It was too late to run to the men’s room and hide in a stall so I stroll to my desk, sit down and say  “ Good morning, Ms. Gee.”

  She’s not here for small talk..She finally looks me square in the eye and asks  “John, would you like to tell me what in the hell happened? “ Before I could begin she follows up with “ Did you know that my phone started ringing at four o’clock Saturday morning and didn’t stop until that afternoon? Did you know that I’ve already had to speak to two mothers this morning who wanted to know if they should have their child’s schedule changed because they’re wondering if we hire psychopaths?”                                                     I told her everything - almost.. She thought for a second, then said, “ I like to enjoy an adult beverage occasionally,” ( I swear those were her exact words )  “ but you don’t shit where you eat, John.”                                                   “ I know, Ms. Gee..I’m sorry,” - and for the first time, I was..”Am I going to lose my job?”         “I don’t know, John - I’ll do what I can but it’s up to the school board. In the meantime don’t be doing any high-fives in the hallway- no “Yeah, kick-ass!”                                               “Yes Ma’am,” I replied..

  And that was it..She was in this too..And I felt like a dirt clod because of it..

  When Ms. Gee announced she was leaving at an impromptu teacher meeting several years later she stood in the conference room doorway and said her personal goodbyes to all that attended.. I didn’t know what to say - there was so much I’d never taken the time to tell her..When it was my turn I shook her hand and said,  “You changed my life..”  Which summed it up perfectly in four words..  She just said, “John” and with both of our eyes glistening, gave me a hug..

  And then I turned and went to do the job that SHE hired me to do..

  I would teach there another fourteen years and it was, by far, the best job I ever had..

  So here’s to you Ms. Gee.. I know that you had my back all those years ago - you considered it a part of your job and we loved you for it..You were the best boss I ever had, and if you aren’t in a class of your own it sure doesn’t take long to call roll..

JBS Blackheart.           Thank you friend-reader

On Death..

 “Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die..”

At 64 I find myself contemplating death more often. It’s an unknowing abstraction to animals - but it’s a very real and inevitable thing to us. There are entire industries built around it.

I’ve been asked several times the meaning of life and I always answer, “I don’t know, I just got here myself.”

Woody Allen said, “ I’m not afraid of dying-I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” Not me - I want to be up and running when my heart blows a piston and be dead before I hit the ground.  I’d miss out on last goodbyes, but farewells are overrated anyway.. (You may be the one on the deathbed but you’ll spend all your time consoling your visitors.) 

I’ve chosen cremation over burial - (I’ve never let anyone walk over me and see no reason to change now..)  Hopefully, my ashes will be strewn in the Brazos River where my roots are and where I’ve had so many good times..

Before Christianity cremation was common, but when Christ was risen and had to assure the Apostle Thomas that it was really him by letting the man put his fingers into the nail holes - things changed.. As usual we overthought and decided that it would be a whole lot easier for God to reanimate an intact body rather than ashes that would have to be collected after being scattered to the four winds.

For a doctor to pronounce a death, ( and only a doctor can do it officially, even if the head is missing, ) certain criteria has to be met. There are a few ways to do this including, 1)  Check the pupils to see if they’re fixed, dilated, and unresponsive to light. 2) Using a rubber bulb syringe squirt ice water into the ear. And, 3)  Take their thumbnail and grind it into the sternum. All of these are done usually after the basics like checking for breathing or a heartbeat, but I find my three ways much more interesting, if not a little sadistic..

If you flunk these tests, you are ready for your thanatoptic chamber..

If you have chosen not to be embalmed you should be buried or burned within 48 hours. Your body begins to decompose immediately after death and by the second day you will begin to get “ fragrant.”  Embalming fixes everything temporarily, allowing your friends and family to say goodbye and then meet afterwards to laugh, eat, get drunk, and tell wonderful stories about you you’d be glad that you’re dead to keep from hearing.. ( The embalming process is nothing short of medieval and hasn’t changed much in the last 5,000 years. )

Then, you are planted ( without shoes ) and the real fun begins..

It costs me never a stab nor squirm, to tread by chance upon a worm,   “ Aha, my little dear,” I say, “ your clan will pay me back one day. “    Dorothy Parker

About 20 years ago a friend committed the ultimate philosophical question - Suicide.         While I was viewing his corpse the few others that were there left..David and I were alone and it didn’t feel creepy at all - as a matter of fact, it felt serene.  I ran my fingers across his shirt and, feeling the crude stitches, knew he’d been autopsied..We talked, ( well, I talked,) for a minute and then I wished him Bon Voyage...

What happens when we die?  No mortal has ever come back from what Shakespeare called the Undiscovered Country to tell us..We all have our own beliefs but only one thing is certain - everyone of us owe God a death, it’s up to us to make sure we have lived..

Life is short - get on with yours..

Thank you friend - reader.        Blackheart

Job and God

 Man born of woman is of few days and filled with turmoil..(Job 14:1)

Job suffered many afflictions and turmoil in very few days - and when he asked God why, God replied -

“Put on your big boy pants and listen..Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?  Have you ever commanded the morning, and caused the dawn to know it’s place? “

“Were the gates of death revealed to you; have you walked through the valley of the shadow of death?”

“Have you given the stallion strength? Can you put the hook into the mouth of leviathan?”          ( crocodile)

And afterwards Job was blessed by God and lived 140 more years and saw his children and grandchildren for four generations..                   And then Job died, very old and happy with days..

Tranny’s and Women’s Sports..

 If you were born with a male member, (I hate the word “penis,” it sounds like something you’d search for with a magnifying glass and a pair of tweezers,) then you should not be allowed to compete in sports against real women..( You know, the kind that can have, like, BABIES!)

The T’s in LGBTQ are destroying women’s sports. Real female’s do not have a chance against surgically mutilated fake ones..             Everyone knows this..( Send all complaints and death threats to WWW. Idon’tgiveafuckwhatyouthink.com.)                     

                                  *

 How’s that Crypto-Currency working out for you? Billions in losses to millions of “investors “ (read, suckers.) Bitcoins never existed and if you put your real money into it it is gone now forever. It was a scam Ponzi scheme from the jump and the ringmaster, Sam Bankman Fried,(who looks much like a full grown failed abortion attempt) has been borrowing from Peter to pay Paul for years. He is as crooked as a blind man’s fence and the number two contributor to Democrats..The number one contributor is the Anti-Christ George Soros who is the only person on this planet I would wish a long, slow, whithering, very fatal disease on.. Do you think Obama, or the Clintons, or Biden, or ANY of them will return a dime since it was so obviously donated by an outlaw?  Don’t hold your breath..

                                 *

There are sheep, there are wolves - and there are sheepdogs..JC is the shepherd..

                                 *

For what better way to die,                                  Than to fight against fearful odds-                     For the ashes of your fathers,                             And the temples of your gods.

                                   *

                   

(This was posted SIX days after the murders in Idaho.) JBS Blackheart 

Whoever slaughtered the four college students last Saturday night in Idaho-                              1)  knew all four of them.                                   2)  will do it again if not arrested ( he wants to be caught, and he wants to be famous.).             3)  worked alone.                                                                  4)   is cold as ice, a bona-fide psychopath. No one kills with a knife..It’s almost impossible to kill four young healthy adults with a blade..It ain’t like the movies - it would have taken time.  

Update - so far I’m three out of four..(Still don’t know Number One.) January 3, 2023

                                  *

There’s a new trend in raising kids called “Free Range Children.”  Let them do whatever they want..Hell, this isn’t new..I’ve seen it in libraries and grocery stores for decades..Screaming, crying, volatile 3 year olds. I’m thinking why don’t you smack ‘em? It won’t make them stop crying but at least you’ll know you’re doing a public service..

                                  *

I need some comments, friend-readers..            ( We all need to feel validated..)

Thanksgiving..

 The lousy, has-been actor John Leguizamo said today that Thanksgiving should be renamed “National Genocide Day” ( evil white peoples slaughtering noble savages.)

This from the guy who got rich through the country he now shits on..

( I am trying so hard not to say “ FUCK” anymore but this dipshit is really making me pump the brakes of my boundaries.)

John Leguizamo - you can kiss my THANKSGIVING celebrating proud white ass.. Fuck you..

Christoper Hitchens was a very talented, hard living writer who maintained his atheism until his death from esophageal cancer..It’s not a matter of empathizing for his eternal soul - he had his chance. It’s a matter of respect for sticking to your guns..

“Brandy, you’re a fine girl, what a good wife you would be..”.    Looking Glass

“You don’t know me well enough to call me John.”       John Dutton - Yellowstone

Biden pardoned two turkeys today named “Hunter” and “ Nancy.”

Suki Tawdry is from the song Mack the Knife..Thank you, Benjie!

Next - Part Finish…Happy Thanksgiving, friend-reader..

More Idle Thoughts..

 The big craze of European opera in the 17th and 18th century was the “Castrato.”  Young boys had their testicles removed so that they could retain the angelic, soprano pitch of a ten year old..( I wonder how often the victims had any say-so in the matter.) 

There is one surviving recording of the last castrato, made in 1903..I guess it is an acquired taste, but I find it a very unsettling, creepy sound, ( as I check my own package reassuringly.)

Of course with no balls there is no puberty - and don’t even bring up the subject of Michael Jackson - (but rumors persisted for decades..)

Castrato’s vocal chords never hardened- they remained flexible - and that gave them range rivaling or surpassing the most talented of female singers.. Despite years of denial the Roman Catholic Church, ( with all their heavenly boys choirs,) assuredly employed and probably created hundreds of them. It wasn’t outlawed until 1903..

Nowadays the same surgical procedure can be done to moody teenagers for the asking..

Below the equator all drains, toilets, etc., swirl the opposite direction than above the equator..

With much wisdom comes much grief - he that increaseth knowledge, increaseth sorrow..   Ecclesiastes 1:18

“You can ponder perpetual motion- fix your mind on a crystal day..”         CCR

True Story..

On May10th, 1864, cadets from the Virginia Military Institute left their school books on their desks and, defending their homeland from Union forces , led an infantry charge across open ground. To this day I can’t watch this scene as portrayed in The Horse Soldiers without wiping away a tear. It is an excellent use of nine minutes- if for no other reason than to see John Wayne, retreating on horseback, wave his captain’s hat in salute..

History is rarely romantic and this event was no different..

The 10th Massachusetts regiment didn’t run - they stayed behind cover and fought for their miserable lives.

Within one hour 10 rebel sons were dead or dying and 47 were wounded.

Valor, the most uncommon of virtues, was common that day..

But not by any damn Yankees..

Must Watch..

 You will laugh-hard, and more than once..Trust me..

Idle Thoughts..

 A comment AND a call!  “I’m Australian, bitch.”  Reply - “ I am SO sorry! But if you’ll forward your address and 20 quid I’ll send flowers and a copy of Little Bo Peep so you can read about your relatives.”

FURY - is the best WWII movie made since The Great Escape..

Who disposes of batteries properly?  That’s what I thought..

“Though we didn’t have much money- we barely made enough to survive, but when we got up on stage and got ready to play - people came alive..Rock and Roll band everybody’s waiting, getting’ crazy, anticipating-“.   Boston

I knew Mireille, but not in a biblical way..

Nancy Pelosi is on her way back to Sodom by the Bay.. She’s had so many face-lifts I’m waiting for that giant C-clamp on the back of her skull to pop loose and watch her eyebrows turn into a mustache..

Do you know what happens when an Asian walks into a brick wall with a full erection? He breaks his nose..

Idle Thoughts..

 Politics is a contact sport - but they really should back off the Donald..

Joe Biden is living proof ( on two cloven hooves, ) that severe inbreeding can be successful..

“I’d go back and do it all over again - many times.”  Tyler

Australians willingly turned in their guns years ago to the government..Astonishingly, the crime rate continued to rise.. Do you know why there are so many sheep in Australia? Because for lack of proper mates the women have to breed with them..

I never look for trouble - but sometimes it seems like trouble looks for me..

Heh..

 Sairo R.

White people have done everything to make my life miserable. Yet I’m supposed to not hate them?!

John 

Oh my gosh! I was at the white peoples meeting last week when your name came up and we were discussing our plans to make your life miserable. We were so afraid that you’d blame yourself for your own fuck-ups instead of us. It’s so great to know that we’re making a difference!!

The Great Unlearning and COVID.

 I was there during the Great Unlearning - in the classroom. In mid - 2019 the outbreak of terror known as COVID, ( or more accurately the China Virus) swept across the country..Our classes ranged in size between 26 - 34 students and we were told to keep everyone six feet apart..Everybody had to wear masks..Have you tried being heard through a mask? Of course you have..I always walked the room when I lectured and I actually got dizzy a few times trying to speak loud and coherently through a quarter inch of microfiber..

Due to government backed mass-paranoia public schools were forced to close..Teachers came to empty rooms in the mornings and attempted to teach in real time, online..

  A few months earlier me and my friend and fellow instructor went to an Arlington location and got the first ( and only - for both of us) Johnson and Johnson vaccine..The J&J cocktail has disappeared and isn’t even discussed anymore. I had a “reaction” and within 3 - 4 days I got radial neuropathy in my hands and feet. Hands recovered completely - but I still feel like my ankles end in two blocks of ice..(At the time I had never even heard of radial neuropathy.)  But at least I’m still alive and kicking..

   My friend had no reaction at all except sudden death one year later..He was a healthy, active man..He was 48 years old…

   There was no autopsy, which I thought was mandatory in Texas unless the cause of death is painfully obvious - like getting hit by a train.. 

    The kids, being young and free-spirited, failed to login. ( There WERE notable exceptions.) 

   It was,by any standard - a stupendous failure. BUT, when it came time for report cards we were very, very, strongly advised to show “Grace.” One clown I knew who drank the Kool-Aid hard even chimed in on the ISD website that NO student should be failed!  And, not surprisingly, none did.. 

20 - 25% never logged in at all..Not once. Many were unable to be reached - totally off the academic grid..

   And now when Johnny can’t read ( or write, or divide) all the Democrats can say is, “The great retarding didn’t just happen in BLUE states, it’s a nationwide catastrophe!!”

   Well, no shit..

   To their credit Texas, Oklahoma, and Florida were the first to say, “Enough!”

    To his discredit Donald Trump still won’t disavow the whole vaccine nonsense..

    And the dipshit Biden can’t even make up his mind whether or not we’re still in a pandemic.. Because it’s about CONTROL, and if we stop testing - then we’ll have to just go back to having colds like before..

JBS Blackheart

Greatness..

La Marseillaise

Before there were synthesizers, sound mixers, and reverberators that could make ME sound good - you had to actually sing..

Mireille Mathieu is emptying her heart into a microphone, and she is VERY proud to be French.. If you’re not fist pumping the air by the end of this one you are either an Oak - or you’re dead..

Vive’ la France!

 

Life is a Caberet old chum..

 Biden is hitting on Russian dudes, complementing them on their big “muscle.” Biden calls them guns and is obviously impressed-disgustingly so..

Call Out - “Suki Tawdry.” If you don’t know that’s okay. But don’t google it yet..

I want that son of a bitches head on a pike..At full speed ran into and over 25 police cadets who were in training..The ONLY reason he even slowed down was because he ran directly into a light pole..I would have carefully extricated him from his wreck with the LAFDs jaws of life - then using the same device snip his head off like a festering boil..

Johnny Mathis (Chances Are) had one of the most beautiful, pitch perfect, voices ever..

JBS Blackheart

Sleeper of the Week - Giant

                         GIANT (1956)

Starting Rock Hudson, Elizabeth Taylor, and James Dean - Directed by George Stevens

  Giant is a masterpiece-although it’s a little too preachy about social justice near the end - but what do you expect from the Yankee Edna Ferber. It was filmed in Marfa, Texas in an attempt to capture the atmosphere of the desolate oilfields of the Great Plains. It worked..

   Riata, the huge ranch house was a facade ( no roof, no walls, and no interior) and still stood rotting away in the beautiful emptiness of southwest Texas until a decade ago..

    Rock Hudson, in the only role he would ever get nominated for, plays BickBenedict -oilman, rancher, and head of an empire..He is the descendant of wildcatters and is extremely rich. ( Hudson was a genuinely all around nice guy..He personally picked Elizabeth Taylor for her part and they would become lifelong friends. Taylor would appear with him shortly before his death from AIDS in 1985..)

  Benedict travels to Tennessee to buy a stallion and to court the southern belle debutante, Taylor..She returns with him to Texas to be his bride. Elizabeth Taylor is at her pinnacle of physical perfection in Giant.. I’ve loved her since I was a kid. My mother looks like a cross between her and Lucille Ball..

    My favorite scene in this entire movie is at the “picnic”, a huge catered celebration.. As Taylor walks down the serving line she is offered calves brains, which she wisely declines.. The server scoops up a large ladle anyway and drops it on her plate with a sickening “Plop.”  She immediately faints but Rock catches her before she hits the ground and carries her inside.

    James Dean portrays the wastrel cousin, Jett Rink,  ( note the initials- his character was the inspiration for Larry Hagmans  JR Ewing in the series Dallas.) Dean had only made two films prior, East of Eden and Rebel Without a Cause, both in the same year 1955..He was incredibly talented and famous in a very short time.. Hudson and Dean didn’t care for each other due to a rumored rejected advance by the former.. On the last day of filming Dean had a new Porsche 550 Spyder delivered on set.. It was September 23, 1955..He would die in it one week later in a horrific high speed crash in California.  He was 24 years old..Dean was dead before the premiere of Giant - but his mangled Porsche would be displayed at one theatre and picked clean by fans collecting souvenirs..Elizabeth Taylor was so distraught upon hearing of the actor’s death she would be hospitalized for two weeks..

    Director George Stevens was one of the industry’s best ever..He had the patience of Job and handled the young mercurial Dean, who called him everything but a child of God, masterfully during filming..Stevens would also create Shane, Diary of Anne Frank, The Greatest Story Ever Told, and A Place in the Sun..

JBS Blackheart 

The Greeks

 The finest fighting formation in the history of mankind was the Greek Phalanx - eight across and eighteen deep.. You locked shields and used your sixteen foot pike to embed in the abdomen, ( or at least armor,) of the enemy.. Then you pulled your short sword and - still in lockstep - thrust for the lower torso or groin, (femoral artery.)

  The ONLY thing between yourself and a fatal wound to the gut from the screaming, spitting man across from you was the comrade to your right..If he screws up you’re probably both dead and the guys behind you would step into the vacancy..

   That’s why the Greeks were so close to their buddies..

JBS Blackheart

Brad Pitt rules.

 

You can’t make this shit up..

 The Democrat party is the most corrupt institution since Caligula’s Roman Empire..And if you can vote for them with a straight face then I beg you not to reproduce..    

The gene pool is already too shallow and the last thing we need is more three-eyed zygotes being buttered in your oven.. There’s no shortage of scoundrels on both sides in Washington - but you are a fucking moron..

His mighty heart just wouldn't quit on it's own..After 17 years..

                                                                    DUKE

           Since you took me in as a pup, from the wild, where I                                 Scavenged to stay alive,                                                                        We've shared the bond that is so rare in life..

           And all I needed was a little food and be by your side..                             I never stayed in a room where you weren't -                                          Never really rested unless you were near...                                                

                                But now it's time..

           The second thing I need from you is do the thing you'll                             Hate most to do..

            We'll lock our eyes for one last time...

                  You were the only god I ever knew -                                              T'was Heaven here to be with you....

          

             JBS Black, aching, Heart..                                                  

Sleeper of the Week

 Up in the Air  (2009)

Directed by Jason Reitman.        

Starring George Clooney and an All-star supporting cast.

The most underrated film of the decade, Up in the Air is a great respite from the same old tired comic book shit..

Leaving politics aside- (I’ve been a Clooney fan since Dr. Doug Ross and ER) - if I boycotted every film because I didn’t care for the actor’s views I’d be stuck watching an endless loop of The Ten Commandments and Midnight Cowboy..

George was born to play this role of a professional traveling downsizer and anyone who has ever been “let go” should watch this movie at least once..I’ve watched it three times and enjoyed it a LOT more the last two..( I missed most of the greatest dialogue and nuances the first time.)

The scene where Clooney and his assistant,(played brilliantly by Anna Kendrick,) fires J.K. Simmons is amazing ..

EVERY scene is superbly acted-(no easy feat,) and EVERY line is perfectly written and delivered..

All films rely heavily on a good title and like the best prison movie ever made, The Shawshank Redemption, Up in the Air suffers from lack of imagination. It didn’t do well at the box office because it had a lousy name..

Three times for me…Showing on Netflix now. Satisfaction guaranteed or price of admission free..

To all my friend-readers who have posted comments on my forum - Thank you!

Always - JBS Blackheart. 

Lazarus

 It was cold last Friday so I put on a tank-top before checking out the pool for castaways..I saw a spider on the bottom - all clenched up like a monkey fist..For some reason I got the net and fished him out..Brought him inside and put him on a paper towel under a 60 watt lamp to dry out..I have NEVER done this before.. An hour passed, then two..Nothing..

After three hours I blew on him and saw a leg move..In another hour he was moving all eight, drying each one at a time..He stretched out and laid back down on the towel..

Soon, although he didn't care for having his photo taken he crawled into my palm..We had a "moment", and I put him back, then went to bed..Five hours later in the morning, he was gone..

He was, (is) a Wolf Spider and they are a little venomous..They don't spin webs - they attack their prey on foot..He is still somewhere in the house - but I'm the only one thrilled about it..

JBS Blackheart

Part Four - "Hey, Mister Stimmel!"'

     I can smell and feel a cold-front moving in..A blue norther but without the sleet..

I walk to the front of my car and with crossed arms, lean against it..The two cops approach slowly, checking my off-brand ass out with, " Approach With Caution," lights blinking on both their foreheads.

"Officers.." I say.

(If buzzed, and speaking to LEO's never say any word beginning with "H" or "W."  Your breath will carry three feet..Cops know this well - it's in their Bag of Tricks- but now, so do you.)

I love cops. They are the salt of the Earth and most of them do an impossible, very dangerous job, for around $60,000  a year with grace and courage..Let that sink in a second..

(The next time you're pulled over check your sideview mirror as he approaches your car. The officer will - 

discretely plant a finger or thumbprint on your taillight..This is because if you have a gun in your crotch and you shoot him, (or her) there will be a unique ID on your vehicle proving that you are the piece of shit that did it..

However.. Cops WILL lie to you - it's part of the job, and if you feel anything is a little hinky - ask him if you are being detained..If not, drive away slowly after merging into traffic with your blinker on.. If so, say very politely but firmly, "All respect, sir - no more talking.." Period.. If you're hauled down to the station say clearly as soon as possible, "Lawyer," ( for the audio and video because I promise you are being recorded..) The rules have been changed now and the less you say the better - if they didn't think there was good cause for you being there you wouldn't be.. If you are arrested and booked for ANY reason wait for your attorney.. Don't discuss the weather,  nothing - anything you say WILL be used against you in a court of law..

Legally, they have to fuck off right then..

Anyway,  more cops, an ambulance, and a couple of fire engines have joined us..Everything in Mansfield that has a red light on top comes too..Now, it's a party..

By now I've already told my story..But I have to say, "This is a lot of attention for one barfight..What's going on?"

" The medics can't get a pulse in his leg.."

One of my students is walking up the sidewalk to the restaurant, "Hey Mister Stimmel!" I wave back.  I see three school buses that were returning with the basketball team from an away game slow down to see what all the commotion is about..

I do my best to look harmless and keep a poker face..

I see Lady again in the crowd and hollar her name..She comes over. "Will you please tell the police what happened?"  It was a roll of the dice, but it was the best play I had..

(Do you know why when the cops are busting down a door they scream, "POE - LEECE!" ?  Because, "Police!" sounds too much like "Please!" - and they're not asking you anything nicely.. Lady tells the story perfectly - including how the guy swung at me first..

Croc Dundee is still on the floor inside, Paramedics and firemen working furiously on him..I can hear two females nearby telling another cop what an asshole he is and that they are both glad he's got a mouthful of bloody Chiclets..

Minutes pass..

BOTH of us, although I don't think either of us cared at the time, are written citations for public disturbance - Fighting In Public - a Class C Misdemeanor.. I am released.. I go back inside and finish my drink..The restaurant manager tells me that I am banned for one year.. Whatever, Scooter.. As I'm leaving , (not behind the wheel!) -  a Care-Flite chopper is landing in the parking lot..Australian was loaded up on a stretcher and into it..I never saw him again but heard that he was deported later on..

But he did get a free helicoptor ride out of the experience!

I still had to deal with work Monday morning..

Next, Part Finish..

God’s Greatest Child

 Of Earth, did man, (some slower than others)

By intrigue and force,

Overwhelm Nature Mother.

So we called ourselves kings,

For did we not,

Reap all before us in relentless onslaught?

We burnt and we cut through rock and through trees,

And by cunning and bronze-

Brought Neanderthal to knees.

And we polished rough lands, and tamed what was wild,

But in shadows were watched-

By God’s greatest child..

Through time’s progressed march,

We grasped and we held,

Art, Science, and Math-

( But at blood we excelled!)

We took as we needed, and did some things quite well-

Break a law at your peril-break a child go to hell.

And through it all we were measured and judged -Still too wild,

When viewed and thought over,

By God’s greatest child..

We sculpt and we painted,

Our emperors and gods,

Went to moon, and split atom,

(regardless of odds!)

And somewhere in time- peace was made,

(Once reviled!)

By both sides- man and canine,

Still - God’s greatest child..

JBS Blackheart  (2022)

Eve of Destruction

 America- it is explodin’ - Violence flarin’

And rifles loadin’

You’re old enough to kill - not old enough for COVID,

Gotta fight for freedom - so that’s a gun I’m totin,’

And even the Brazos river - has bodies floatin’

But you tell me

Over and over and over again my friend,

You don’t believe we’re on the Eve of Destruction..

Thanks to Barry McGuire