Rehab..(Part 3)

 Lewis and me were buddies..He was a black guy that reminded me of Sidney Portier a little. Quiet.. He knew how to size folks up and make excellent judgment calls with very little data..Didn’t suffer fools gladly.. He pegged me pretty quick as the Saltine I was, but I don’t give up easy..( When I run into a person who actively decides they don’t want to have anything to do with me it just makes me want to try harder..)  Once he accepted the unlikely fact that we were going to be friends he gave in pretty fast, ( or he was just humoring me the whole time..)                                                         We were called, ( behind our backs) the Kook and the Spook..

 One day after breakfast we got to talking and of course, being in a Rehab and all, the conversation soon became inappropriate..         “Hey man, I’m curious” I said, “Do you, umm, do your - “  Lewis looked at me out of the corner of his eye - “My people?” He said..            “Yeah!  Do y’all really not shampoo your hair- you just, like, change the oil every once in a while?”                                                               “Yes, some..”   Well, that was no answer, so I looked at him with a stupid, questioning stare..

 “ Have you ever used a balloon to comb your hair?” He asked..” That’s what my hair would look like if I used your shampoo..”

 This was starting to get interesting so I kept going, “ Well, what about food preferences?”   Again, he knew exactly where I was clumsily trying to go..” Don’t YOU like fried chicken and watermelon?” he dryly asked..                       “Okay, but what’s up with all the Tobasco, and the Red Hot Blow Up Your Ass flavored Cheetos?” I was really getting myself worked up in a lather now.

 Once again he got all cryptic, “Just a preference maybe - maybe it’s just a black thang, you know..” But I didn’t know.. I liked a few jalapeños occasionally  - some Tobasco on a good cheeseburger - but to me HOT isn’t really a flavor, it’s just hot..And I’d never put it on ice cream for Pete’s sake! 

“ Let’s go play chess”..he said. And so we did.